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Ferrari in transporter controversy

Jerez, Monday: Ferrari’s Formula One team could be in hot water with the FIA today after an incident in the Jerez paddock during yesterday’s test session.

The Jerez test, where eight of F1’s teams for this year are trying out their new machinery on track at the same time, saw few on-track dramas as teams worked to perfect their all-new innovations. However, the lack of fireworks on the circuit was more than made up for by the soap opera unfolding in the paddock.

Controversy: Ferraris transporter

Controversy: Ferrari's transporter

A Force India truck driver, moving one of his team’s transporters, alerted the FIA when he claimed that a Ferrari lorry was “unsafely released” in front of him during the test session yesterday. “I don’t know what he thought he was doing,” the driver told journalists after the incident. “It was almost as if he was trying to barge my truck off the car park completely – it could have been very dangerous.”

The Ferrari trucker responsible blamed his Indian counterpart for the near-collision. “He should have been looking where he was going,” he said defiantly. “My truck is bigger, so I have right of way. Simple.” The Runoff Area could not possibly comment on whether the Ferrari employee’s nationality had anything to do with his “unique” road etiquette.

McLaren mechanics, who were for some reason watching the incident as it unfolded, immediately logged onto Internet forums worldwide and began complaining vociferously about the FIA’s “favouritism” towards the Ferrari truckers. “Ferrari should be disqualified from the championship and fined $100 million,” one particularly unoriginal team employee wailed. “In a GP2 test session earlier this month, the Super Nova team were fined for exactly the same thing, yet Ferrari will get away with this. It’s just not fair. Sob.”

The FIA have yet to issue a statement on the matter, although it is reported that they have dismissed a request from McLaren for twenty-five seconds to be added to Felipe Massa’s lap times.


One Response

  1. As hilarious as ever – good work!

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