• Disclaimer

    The Runoff Area is a website devoted to the purposes of humour and satire, not a serious motorsports news publication. When reading articles on this website - even you credulous folks over at ApexSpeed - please try to understand that they are not intended to be taken seriously. Sebastian Vettel is not a baby, I know of no plans to host a Grand Prix in South Ossetia, and Kimi Raikkonen doesn't respond to everything with a "bemused grunt." Or does he?
  • Legal Bit

    The text content of all posts from The Runoff Area are the intellectual property of Red Andy. You can share the jokes with your friends if you like, but please provide a link to the original. Images used on this website are not the property of The Runoff Area, and thus, where possible, a link is provided to the original image. If you own an image that is used on this site and would like it removed, please contact the webmaster.

Autosport in protest over news timing

London, Friday: British motorsport magazine Autosport has expressed its displeasure at the motorsports world today, in a statement pointing out that a disproportionate amount of news happens on Wednesday, after the magazine has passed its print deadline.

Stressed: Autosport offices, yesterday

Stressed: Autosport offices, yesterday

“This obvious and unfair discrepancy means that we keep having to publish stories a week after everyone else has already reported them,” a spokesman for Autosport said. “For some reason, the FIA World Council insists on having its meetings on Wednesday, and then refuses to announce any results until the evening. And whenever there’s an important announcement or decision to be made, it’s always handed to us on Wednesday afternoon. I mean, what’s so bad about Tuesday? Or Wednesday morning, at least?”

The midweek surge in new stories, the magazine points out, is especially surprising given that they are covering a sport that usually takes place at the weekend. “But all the off-track stuff happens during the week. So now we have to fill our pages with race reports from pointless series like Formula BMW USA and the NASCAR Sprint Cup, while every other magazine publishes their stories on time.

“It’s obviously being done to try and remove us from our position as Britain’s leading motorsports publication. To be quite honest, we feel somewhat persecuted,” said the spokesman, whose name was later revealed to be Barry Kello.

Other motorsports media outlets were unsympathetic, however. A representative from F1 Racing pointed out: “How do they think we feel? Sometimes our stories come out over a month late,” while a statement from Planet-F1 read, “Auto-what? We get all of our news fresh from some bloke down the pub.” The Daily Mail were too busy composing an irrational hit piece against Fernando Alonso to comment.

The FIA are expected to respond to Autosport‘s allegations after a World Motor Sports Council meeting on Wednesday, though a statement is not expected until late afternoon or early evening.

If you’re a fan of The Runoff Area, check out the “Max Mix” on YouTube – a Cassetteboy-style dissection of Max Mosley himself!

Advertisements

2 Responses

  1. LOL! I love this one, definitely the best yet.

  2. I love this one! Especially the Daily Mail man writing an article about Fernando!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: